Greetings from Tianjin.

Population: 9.8 Million.

The past 24 hours seem to mush together. It was terrible turning away from my family at the airport and even worse climbing the steps into the plane. I felt like I was committing some great mistake by turning away from them.

It was by some strange fate that I made my flight to Beijing after a 2 hour delay at Canton/Akron. The food on my flight over was pretty good and I was able to keep myself occupied until my Ambien-induced stupor took its effect. I was able to get about 8 hours of sleep on my flight… which feels like nothing right now.

Jen, Howard (my boss), and our driver met me at the airport. It takes about 2 hours to get from Beijing to Tianjin. The scenery leaves much to be desired. It's barren and grey. The smog is all-permeating and reminds me of the fog that encompasses Hatteras Island in the morning before a humid rain swallows your body.

I live in a hotel. The three of us on this floor share a kitchen down the hall. I don't plan on preparing anything more than sandwiches and easy-mac as of right now. And for that, it will suffice. Jen and I share a wall. It's nice to know that she's just a knock away. Across the hall is John. He seems nice enough for now.

I was able to sleep off and on last night. I watched some of the olympics and instant messaged family and friends using my cell phone. Howard picked Jen and I up this morning and we bought my cell phone and internet card. After connecting to the internet, I was able to talk to my mom and Josh via Skype.

Afterwards, Jen and I took the subway into the city and I indulged in the best latte of my life.

We attract a lot of attention. In a city of close to 10 million people, only 3,000 are ex-patriates. We are a rare commodity and are treated as such with dead-pan stares and not-so-sublte picture taking. Even the children stare at us.

Tonight, Jen has organized a dinner so that I may meet the other teachers. We are going to get dumplings at a restaurant nearby. I'm not sure how late I will be able to stay awake right now, but I'm getting used to the time-change.

I'm sure I will have more exciting news to share soon... and hopefully I will have more energy to share my experiences.

It's Official.

I'll be leaving the Canton-Akron Regional Airport February 22nd at 10:30am.

Currently, the fear is overwhelming. I'm sure that I'll struggle immensely with the language barrier, eating habits, and general customs while overseas, but I am confident that I can overcome. However, I fear being away from my family and friends without a readily available route home. For some strange reason, this fear intrigues me and I want to see if I can handle it. I want to see if I am emotionally tough enough to handle the distance and the new experience.

Everyone has been asking me why I've decided to make this move and I still struggle to explain my reasons. I wrote a brief entry in my journal while waiting for my plane to board to China last October that I hope helps explain my decision.

"...[S]he told me about his (my father's) decision to move to Florida after high school. To look at your world and decide that you need something new defines so much about who he was. Sometimes you need to leave your environment, pack your bags, grab a motorcycle, and head to Florida. So do it."

My father was the ultimate dreamer. He lived by a different set of ideals. Cashing in his 401k to become a pilot would be an outlandish decision for most other men, but he saw no other option. He had wanted to be a pilot since childhood and made it happen.
It must have just been by observation that I gained this character trait from my father. I don't remember him sitting me down and having a heart to heart with me about reaching for your dreams or anything like that. He was a man of few words, but his actions spoke volumes.

So, the other night while fittingly having dinner at the local Chinese restaurant with my mother, I tried to explain to her my decision to move to China. So, here goes...
I feel like moving to Pittsburgh has been the best decision of my life. It defined me and made me rely on myself. The isolation gave me a new-found independence that sparked new desires that I doubt I would have discovered while living in Ohio. Unfortunately though, by the end of my college career, I became overwhelmed with everything I was involved with. 18 credit hours a semester, undergraduate research, undergraduate advising, health problems, president of a few clubs, active member countless others... all while trying to keep a social life and be a daughter, sister, and friend. I became emotionally swamped and fled back to Ohio - my safe place. I refer to that time in my life as my "hibernation."
It's been over a year since I moved back to Ohio. I've reevaluated myself and my desires. I have become more passionate about my future and I know that I need to kick-start the rest of my life. It's time to wake the sleeping bear and jump into something again. I see China as yet another opportunity for introspection. The isolation will provide me with an opportunity to discover my true passions and clear my head yet again. Away from all that I know, I will have no other choice but to rely on myself.

Do you get it, now?